5 stars (My new hero) - Melody Beattie is my new hero. She has walked through the trenches, fought the battle and lived not only to tell about it, but to offer hope for those of us who are still in the battlefield or still shell shocked from the trauma of it all. I recognized myself in her descriptions of a co-dependent, sometimes painfully so. I had to put the book down a time or two, because I felt she came right off the page to knock me into reality. I heard of the book from Dr. Irene's verbal abuse site [...] which stated this book is a must read for those of us with codependent behavior. I have to agree. I am looking forward to applying my newfound knowledge and the confidence acquired from it in oncoming life situations. I hope to become my own new hero. 4 stars (just what I needed) - I am currently reading this book and loving it. I am taking a long time to finish it because it is so deep. It is easy reading, but in order to get much out of it you really have to read it slowly and of course change your wrong behavior, one step at a time. I like the fact that the author tells you that change does take time. It seldom happens overnight. Very comforting for someone who wants to see huge changes overnight. I also like that she encourages you to have a relationship with God. He is the only one whom we are supposed to be codependent with. Eveyone else is imperfect, just like me. . 5 stars (Great Truth About the Causes of Relationship Pain) - In `Codependent No More', Melody Beattie sheds great awareness of the patterns that people are engaged in that lead to pain. Termed `Codependent' Beattie clearly and honestly outlines the behaviors, reactions, responses and patterns that are prevalent in codependent relationships. Control is a major factor, that is, that you are trying to control the other person to get what you want out of the relationship, which leaves you feeling drained and depleted. She gives wonderful questions in the book that you can answer to bring... Hazelden :: Self-Help & Substance Abuse :: Substance abuse :: Self-care :: Health :: Self-Help :: Recovery :: Patients :: Family relationships :: Codependency :: Melody Beattie :: :: Codependent No More - How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
5 stars (A new classic) - If change were easy, a lot of us (psychologists, counselors, health care providers) would be out of work. Still, that doesn't stop us from complaining about those clients and patients who just won't do what we think is in their best interest. Motivational Interviewing, a "client-centered, directive method for enhancing intrinsic motivation," was developed specifically to help faciliate change in "resistant" populations and has been embraced by addictions treatment and general health care professionals alike. The entirely re-written, highly readable, second edition of MOTIVATIONAL INTERVIEWING updates readers on the state of the art and science of MI, and provides a practical guide for helping people to make all kinds of behavior changes. The book opens with a brief review of the converging lines of inquiry that supported the development of MI and an overview of core concepts such as readiness to change, ambivalence, and an interpersonally-based understanding of motivation. The second section is a guide to practice. While "spirit" is emphasized over technique, this section is filled with practical advice on how to increase motivation for change while minimizing resistance. A new chapter on ethics addresses the concerns that arise when attempting to motivate clients to do something they aren't sure they want to do. Consistent with the method's client-centered approach, the third section constitutes a chapter on learner-centered training in MI. The fourth section - comprising about half the volume - includes diverse contributed chapters on applications of MI. These include a discussion of MI and the Stages of Change model with which it is often associated; an excellent review of efficacy research in MI; adaptations of MI such as brief advice and MI with couples or groups; and applications with specific populations and settings. The application chapters necessarily vary in format but share in common careful consideration of the rationale for M... The Guilford Press :: PSY038000 :: Psychology & Psychiatry & Addictions :: Treatment :: Substance abuse :: Psychotherapy - General :: Psychopathology - Compulsive Behavior :: Psychopat :: Motivational Interviewing- Second Edition- Preparing People for Change
5 stars (you need to want it) - After 15 years of heavy smoking it was the time to quit after my son was born. Whatsoever... it was a hard struggle and whenever i had the urge to smoke i picket up the book from Mr. Carr and it made the desire disappear. I did not use the book to quit smoking. (I did it cold turkey) it was actually not even after three month that i picket it up for the first time. When i had that urge and read a couple of pages it made me realize how stupid it was to ever light a cigarette again. I have not smoked since. It is still hard sometimes but whenever i feel the need to smoke i pick up the book instead. And i tell you. It works. 5 stars (I don't know how but it seems to work!!!) - I smoked for almost 18 years, 12 to 15 a day and never had the courage to have a serious attempt to quit. I tried reducing (I created spread sheets with graphs, daily averages, formulas to calculate rewards, penalties, comparing months, days, hours and all) for more than a year, which was an enormous struggle and did not help at all to reduce my desire to smoke and I think it made cigarettes even more precious for me than they were ever before. Recently, before boarding for a 7 hour flight, I bought a pack of nicotine gums - for the first time in my life. After trying it in the flight and afterwards, I realised it helped me and I didn't feel like smoking that much. So I set a date, stopped smoking cigarettes and started chewing nicotine gums from that day onwards. I was thinking that it was going very good by the help of miraculous nicotine gums and keep asking myself why I did not try them before. In the meantime, I had a tiny question in my mind: will it be also easy for me to quit nicotine gums when the time comes? After 10 days, I realized I don't crave for cigarettes anymore but for gums and took it as a good sign. As a coincidence, I heard about Mr. Carr's "way", seminars and books towards the end of the 2nd week of my attempt and decided to read the book ... Sterling :: SELF IMPROVEMENT - ADDCTN&RECVRY TRD HC :: Sale Books :: Tobacco habit :: Substance Abuse & Addictions - Smoking :: Substance Abuse & Addictions - General :: Sm :: The Easy Way to Stop Smoking - Join the millions who have become nonsmokers using the Easyway method
5 stars (The Language of Letting Go Cards - 50 Card Deck) - (Note: Amazon lumps all Language of Letting Go products together. This review refers to ISBN#1401903479 which is a 50 card deck based on the book of the same name.) "Today I will trust that the events occurring in my life are not random. My experiences aren't mistakes, and the Universe, my Higher Power, and life are not picking on me. I'm going through exactly what I need to go through to learn something valuable-something that will prepare me for the joy and love that I'm seeking." -from the Trusting in Life card Melody Beattie, the bestselling author of The Language of Letting Go, has created a 50 card deck reminding us that we can ask for and accept the healing energy of God and the Universe each and every day. Based on her bestselling book, this beautifully illustrated deck inspires both self empowerment and present moment awareness. By truly living in the present moment, we can allow life to happen instead of trying to force outcomes. Relinquishing regrets over the past and fears about the future, we can make the most of every day. The Language of Letting Go Cards gently prods us to take a closer look at the limiting beliefs we've adopted, providing an empowering affirmation on each card. A few of examples from the deck: Accepting Change "Today I will be open to the process of change. I will trust my Higher Power and believe that the place where I'll be dropped off is better than the place where I was picked up. I know that change is necessary to take me wherever I need to go." Approving of Myself "I will let go of my need for approval and my need to be liked. Instead, I will choose to like and approve of myself. The people who count (including me) will respect me when I'm true to who I really am." Maintaining Boundaries "Today I will gain a new awareness of those areas where I need healthier boundaries. I will release my na??ve assumption that the other person is always right. I will exchange... Hazelden :: Self-Help & Substance Abuse :: Self-Help :: Religious aspects :: Recovery :: Prayer-books and devotions :: Meditations :: Meditation :: English :: Devotional calendar :: The Language of Letting Go (Hazelden Meditation Series)
5 stars (Absolutely brilliant) - This is the best book so far I have read on sex addiction and codependancy.. the behaviours, the reasons, backgrounds and the likes. It's a great book for both sex addicts and their partners and families to gain a full understanding of how we work, how we function as sexual beings, and why sex addiction is so hard to give up. As I am studying for a counselling degree in this area, I found the book to be invaluable in reading into reasons why people do what they do for comfort and the likes. It will be a great reference book to store in my office! I highly recommend this book to anyone who is living in an addictive world - my understanding of this disease is now much greater and I anticipate I will be buying and reading a lot more of Carnes' books. 5 stars (A great first book) - I found this book to be very helpful in understanding my partners sex, love addiction; what are the belief systems, how it works, and how I play into it. Chapter five: Coaddiction was very insightful and helpful for me, personally. I have also discovered Pia Mellody, Facing Codependence to be very validating and insightful. Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction was the first book I read that really helped me wrap my brain around what sexual addiction is and what it isn't. 5 stars (Profoundly Eye-Opening) - This book has allowed me to see myself outside of myself and to see _why_ I have done some of the things I've done in the past. I'm still finishing it up and will be ordering other related books to this subject by this author. Thanks for the much needed help! ... Hazelden :: Self-Help & Substance Abuse :: Substance Abuse & Addictions - Sexual :: Sex addiction :: Self-Help :: Recovery :: General :: Ph D :: Patrick Carnes :: :: Out of the Shadows- Understanding Sexual Addiction
2 stars (For shame) - What is the longevity of John Bradshaw's book, and how does his writing stand up in the perspective of time. The book was published over ten years ago, and it seems to have dropped through the cracks of the large and populous human growth floorboards, of which it was a part. The first thing I noticed about Bradshaw's writing is its sheer verbosity. He writes in a roundabout way, rather than concisely and to the point. Contrast him, for example, with a writer on Buddhism or Taoism (say, Alan Watts?). Writing on Buddhism or Taoism may provide authors with a natural impetus to be concise, but the human growth movement is broad and billowy, and concise writing may not be important to the authors. And Bradshaw seems to drag in every alley cat he ever heard meow in the human growth movement, to help him reflect on what he sees as the underlying principle of it all: Shame. Bradshaw reports that he is a theologian, but also someone who recovered from alcoholism, and was deeply shamed as a child, which shame he finally learned to deal with and overcome. There are many fine snippets from his book, which may be of use to folks, but overall, I think most people looking for direction are going to be repelled by his constant conceptualizations. To paraphrase another well-known quotation, "People cannot live on concepts alone." If he had given more personal studies or little case histories, it would have been much more helpful. Instead, he includes page after page of some "guided" meditations or shame inquiries, which were totally useless to me. If you are looking for guided meditations, this is the place for you. So, in all, Bradshaw's book does not hold up to scrutiny after time, in my opinion. It's one of the many from its era and niche that was forgotten and will be unlikely to remembered henceforth. Anyway, it was a bestseller once, and that's what counts, I guess. It did have its 15 minutes of fame, and a lot of books never even ... HCI :: Self-Help & Adult Children of Substance Abusers :: Shame :: Psychotherapy :: Psychology :: Personal Growth - General :: John Bradshaw :: :: Healing the Shame That Binds You